Rangers Blow First Two Games Of Playoffs

[CamKneely]

The New York Rangers have dug themselves a hole, dropping two games to the Montreal Canadiens, 4-3 and 5-3.

The problems have so far been mainly due to curious coaching decisions, not to mention the skill of the Canadian upstars. "I don't know what he's thinking." said a candid Geoff Courtnall, in reference to the coaching of James Daniels.

Courtnall was played at center for the first two periods of game one. The Rangers were shut out. Leading scorer Mario Lemieux, who had been started at left wing for the first two periods, went back to his regular center position for the third and promptly scored a hat trick, getting the Rangers back into the game, but just narrowly ran out of the time needed to send the game into overtime.

Daniels refused to comment following the losses. It is believed that Courtnall was put at center in an attempt to jumpstart the offense, which in some circles was criticized for faultering towards the end of the season due to predictability. This was mentioned to Courtnall.

"Well, I appreciate it, but I like playing wing. Come on. Do I look like a center? I'm way too much of a finesse guy for that." Some reporters laughed, as Courtnall glumly grinned along.

"I don't really know what's going on out there." said Lemieux. "I'm doing all I can, but when you're playing with one good winger and a garbage can, you can only do so much."

This obvious reference to the struggling play of winger Pelle Ecklund was not surprising, as his nonchalance has made him an outcast in the locker room. Feisty bench player Stephane Lebeau was inserted in his place in game two, and managed to shake things up a bit, but obviously not as much as hoped as the Rangers lost again.

"It's obvious why we're losing!" said defenseman Petr Svoboda. "It's all my fault because I'M NOT HITTING ENOUGH! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!" Svoboda then headbutted a locker, putting a small dent in his forehead.

Daniels' refusal to talk to the press hasn't managed to keep the fans in the dark, as word leaked from an unnamed player that backup goaltender Ken Wregget will be starting game three.