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Devils Can't Catch Break In Canada

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VANCOUVER, CANADA --- The countdown inches closer...

31 losses stand between the New Jersey Devils and total embarassment. The latest beatings came to the Canucks, both by scores of 6-0. What was notable in game 1 of that home and home was that the Devils were only able to get 2 shots off against Vancouver's rock solid defense, and that meant an easy night for Bill Ranford. "These guys are glorified minor leaguers" Ranford told reporters after making two saves.

Off to Vancouver for the other side of the home and home, and once again, the Devils dug themselves a hole early and forgot to bring their shovels, en route to another 6-0 drubbing. At least this time, they got 10 shots off. New Jersey reclaims their spot as the most inept offense in GDL history, with a 1.97 GFA this season. Nobody knows for sure when, or even if, the bleeding will stop...but everyone knows this: If New Jersey goes 0-56, head coach Tom Delgado will walk away from the Devils, GDL, and hockey in general, forever. "No sense in going on when all you're gonna do is embarass yourself, right?" Delgado said before quickly running to his car...which was no longer in the parking lot because apparently Felix Potvin stole it to make a quick getaway to avoid getting yelled at.

SIDE NOTE - Coach Delgado has lost 34 straight GDL games, dating back to last season before he resigned. He is now on pace to create a brand new record for futility with 65 straight losses.


Wanted in Vancouver for Grand Theft Auto

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Great stuff Magus. You are still ahead of me in the NHL Power Rank :unsure:.

...but who has 5 wins, and who has a 36-game GDL losing streak? :P

Fair play to you though :)

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